* "I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV."
  * If the human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.
  * No amount of careful planning will ever replace dumb luck.
  * Luck, that's when preparation and opportunity meet. -- P.E. Trudeau
  * 'Tis the dream of each programmer,\\ Before his life is done,\\ To write three lines of APL,\\ And make the damn things run.
  * I told my kids, "Someday, you'll have kids of your own." One of them said, "So will you." -- Rodney Dangerfield
  * You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist. -- Indira Gandhi
  * Secretary's Revenge: Filing almost everything under "the".